The Highway.com
Commentaries of a 21st Century Heretic
“I’m getting married this Sunday!” My friend Michael could not contain himself, as he eagerly awaited the day, today, June 15, 2003. I truly did not know how to feel.
What God Hath Joined
In celebration of the marriage of a dear friend.
(June 15, 2003)
Michael is marrying Brian, enjoying the benefit of long awaited legislation in Canada finally allowing gays to legally wed. Michael actually married Brian August 24, 1985, and have lived as one for almost 19 years. They have made a life for themselves, an accomplishment once considered typical for two so much in love, an oddity in our disposable age. They have done this while weathering some of the harshest criticism from a world unwilling to see them for who they truly are, two people who have lived as one in heart mind and soul . . . and yes in flesh. They have remained steadfast and true, committed to each other “for better, for worse, for richer or poor, in sickness and in health, till death do them part.”
“But you are already married.” I wanted to remind him, but then I considered something our friendship had made me forget. My friend Michael is gay. I had come to know a person whose committed relationship reminded me so much of mine, a deep love that knows no bounds transforming even the most mundane of activities into a life altering experience, a comfort zone that makes even the worst in life seem palatable. In concentrating on our similarities, I had forgotten our differences. My marriage was officially recognized by the laws of my land the first time around. His was not.
A piece of paper that represented an antiquated stereotype was a chasm between us that I never truly explored. I never thought how important it was, because It was something I could easily take for granted. After all, could man tear asunder what God had already joined?
But this is the real world, and yes, a simple piece of paper, a law, did in Canada, still does in the United States of America. A court told him for years his life was a charade, though all evidence pointed to the contrary. A society told him he was wrong and still does, but now the law, a piece of paper, sides with him. He has won. . . they have won. Today, they will be legally one! Today, their love will finally triumph! Today, man cannot try to tear them asunder!
I think of another friend, whose life partnership has now past 36 years as he quietly lives his life in peace. I have never asked him if he considers his relationship a marriage, though I feel it is. A piece of paper and a choice still elude him as our country still clings to the doctrines of old. God willing, Michael and Brian will, share their 37th year as legally one; will my other friend have the legal right to do the same? Maybe he does need to be recognized, to stand tall and be counted, to fit in. Maybe he does need that piece of paper celebrating his commitment. Maybe he does not. He should have the right to decide for himself, a choice my friend Michael can now finally take for granted, filling the chasm that separated his marriage from mine.
Today, my friend Michael is getting married!
All I can say . . . congratulations!
I am excited for you both, happy that world will now have to recognize what I already see, what the two of you already know. I feel a small piece of the world has been made right with a piece of paper that welcomes you in wedded bliss. I agree with you that this is just the beginning of a road already traveled, that August 24, 1985 can now be forever carved in stone, and I pray rest of the world follows suit. I pray it admits that God can and does join, does not discriminate, and man has no business trying to tear it asunder.
In my humble opinion, it is about time!
An interesting site, please take the time to check out the Phoenix Declaration, a multi-denominational petition, churches, pastors and laypeople seeking to end the discrimination of GLBT's in the United States of America. Show your support and sign a much overdue document.
